FIRST THE MUSLIMS CAME FOR ……………. AND THEN FINALLY THEY CAME FOR ME – JAKE NEUMAN –THE LAST KAFIR LIVING ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH
First the Muslims came for the Zoroastrians and I had no idea of what a Zoroastrian was and then I learnt that they were one of the oldest religions but were decimated when the Muslims conquered Persia (Iran) going from around 40 million to about 190,000 mostly living in the US/Canada/India. I did not speak out because I was not a Zoroastrian.
Then the Muslims came for the Bahá'í raping, beheading and hanging men, women, young girls. I had never heard of the Bahá'í and besides they were from Iran thousands of miles away and not my problem and therefore I did not care about them.
Then the Muslims came for the Hindus murdering over 80,000,000. All I knew about Hindus was that they were from India which was for all I cared on another planet and I did nothing.
Then the Muslims came for the Buddhists murdering 10,000,000 but I had never met a Buddhist and besides what they believed in like re-incarnation was nonsensical to me so I did not speak out.
Then the Muslims came for the Yazidi driving them from their homes pillaging, raping and enslaving thousands of young girls as sex slaves. I watched on CNN in horror but was relieved when CNN declared that these horrendous acts were being committed by ISIS who were not true Muslims and had misinterpreted and corrupted the word of God in the Holy Quran. Day after day, I watched and felt so sorry for these poor girls being sold in slave markets recorded on social media but I quickly forgot about them because the baseball championships had started.
Then the Muslims came for the Sikhs another bunch of another strange religion. I learnt that Muslims had given them an ultimatum hundreds of years ago to convert to Islam or have their babies disemboweled and their torn apart baby bodies hosted ahigh on swords. Horrific as this was, I knew that this was not the true Islam but again misunderstanders of the true Islam and besides Sikhs dressed weirdly.
Then the Muslims came for the blacks murdering 120,000,000 - castrating the surviving black men they enslaved so they could not procreate. Millions died bleeding to death. In Nigeria, they destroyed whole regions of the country, murdering, beheading thousands. In one village they had kidnapped hundreds of girls from school and took them into the jungle. I was of course horrified and felt so sorry for these poor girls who only wanted to get an education. I watched the media go into a frenzy for a few weeks with Michelle Obama leading with her Bring Our Girls Back campaign but after a few months I forgot about them when the media and Michelle had quickly lost interest. Out of sight - out of sound and therefore out of my mind.
Then the Muslims came for the gays killing them in the worst ways imaginable throwing them off buildings, driving trucks over them, burning them alive. But I knew this was not the true Islam even though Islam was filled with teachings ordering their murder. But when the vast majority of Gays rose up in support of Islam denouncing anyone who dared defend the murdered gays, I quickly lost all interest in plight of the few. If the gays didn’t care for their own then why should I.
Then the Muslims came for the Jews blowing them up in Israel, attacking them with knives, guns, vehicles, missiles, but Israel was an oppressive country enslaving the Palestinians denying them their freedom and besides it was better for us if Israel just disappeared appeasing the Muslims so they would not blow us up in our country.
Then the Muslims came for the Christians murdering 60,000,000, destroying 30,000 churches, turning Egypt, Iraq, Syria, Turkey from Christian to Muslim countries. I really didn’t care too much because Christians themselves didn’t care about the plight of Mid East Christians. Christian leaders from the Pope to ministers all sang the praises of Allah and Muhammad, holding interfaith ceremonies, allowing churches to be turned into mosques. These leaders turned a blind eye to the torture of Christians in Muslim lands rarely if ever standing for the human rights of these oppressed. If the Christians didn’t give a damn then why should I
Then it came to pass after a time that Islam had spread throughout the world forcing all inhabitants to convert to Islam or be killed. Most quickly joined the new reality becoming even more devout in their new religion then their converters and enthusiastically embraced the Quran drenching the world in a bloodbath that destroyed upwards of a billion. During this time of the Great Islam conquest, I desperately disguised myself dressing like a Muslim, praying like a Muslim, eating like a Muslim, but alas after a few years I was denounced as a fraud by my family and dragged out of my home discovering that I was the last surviving kafir on earth.
I became an instant worldwide celebrity. I was paraded in front of CNN, NBC, FOX who had long ago became mouthpieces for the Islamic order lead by Bill O’Reilly, Megyn Kelly, Christiane Amanpour, and their ilk transported to Washington now the capital of the Caliphate of Erdogan The Great, where I was tortured in ways not yet imagined. Billions of Muslims yelling Allah Akbar viewed my dissection live while my arms were being hacked off, disemboweled so my guts hung out while screaming trained eagles devoured my innards and then a knife slowly started cutting my neck, blood poring out like a gusher everywhere. The blade got broken on the vertebrae so 2 Muslims jumped up and grabbed my head twisting it like a chicken until the vertebrae finally broke apart severing my head. The Muslims held it up to the delirious screams and delight of the rejoicing billions.
The strange thing was that I still felt consciousness like I was in a suspended state and then I screamed and screamed as I woke from my dream. I felt my head still attached to my body, I felt my blankets soaked not from blood but from sweat. I was so relieved that I start to hysterically laugh. Then I heard the downstairs door being smashed in and yelling and screaming hordes running up the stairs.
And then I - Jake Neuman - the Last Kafir ceased to exist.